Read Part 1 and Part 2 first
Brides-to-be can have an unavoidable habit of playing the victim…the damsel in distress in-waiting for her dream day to come true. An “All-About-Me” attitude can erupt, as you feel like the world revolves you for the time being. Playing the victim is a control mechanism, and you use it when it suits you best…and may I add, what better timing to use this opportunity of becoming “the bride” to play this role? You may be at a high-sensitivity and emotional peak, so pointing the finger at someone else is easier and makes you feel better about yourself. But never being at fault just because you’re the bride-to-be can be tiresome to a fiancé who necessarily isn’t always to blame either. Fess up to your role in the problems you’re facing, apologize and make the necessary changes when appropriate. It’s difficult for anybody to take responsibility for bad behavior, but once you give up the victim mentality, you’ll find yourself less stressed, angry and resentful…and your soon-to-be husband will be happier, too.
Forgetting the smaller gestures can be a big problem. Those everyday signs of affection are what keep intimacy and romance alive, yet many couples fail to remember to do them, especially in days leading up to wedding as you’re stressed and consumed with the planning. No matter how big or small, spread as much sweetness around as possible.
Sooo….forget sweating the small stuff, and remember to spread the small stuff that matters!
And before you become a heartbroken bride-to-be, make sure not to make any of the mistakes mentioned above. And the biggest one of all? CLOSED COMMUNICATION! Keep the lines of communicating clearly to each other WIDE OPEN…in an honest, non-judgmental space.
You want to communicate as a couple and make sure any unrealistic expectations are kept at bay to a restored balance and healthy dose of dreams, hopes, and aspirations. We’re all human, imperfections and flaws and all that jazz. The key lies in working through the inevitable hardships that you’ll encounter as a couple. It’s in the continual sacrificing, listening and loving, that husbands and wives become soul mates on a more evolved, elevated level of existence.
Oh, of course,…and if he sees you in your wedding dress, your doomed.
Aleana’s Bridal, Paramus, NJ